In this episode, Jamee Tenzer, professional speaker and coach’s coach, shares the benefits of challenging conversations and how to have them successfully.
Jamee and host, Brooke Bailey, walk us through a four-step process for reclaiming our energy and embracing difficult conversations:
- Step 1: Become aware of the thoughts stuck in your head, then determine which ones you can process on our own and which ones need an action-based decision.
- Step 2: Create your own incentives to have the difficult conversation. Get clear on the possibilities you can create from the conversation.
- Step 3: Establish what you need the other person to hear.
- Step 4: Determine how you want to feel after the conversation. What would you like for the other person?
This is a great episode for personal as well as professional thrivers. Brooke and Jamee will take you through scenarios on how to deal with a difficult relationship conversation, including how to have a challenging conversation with a coaching client.
Creating incentives and possibilities for the conversation, as well as identifying how you would like the other person to benefit from the conversation, will help you create energy around a difficult topic, rather than letting it drain you.
BONUS: Jamee offers complementary support for your next difficult conversation!
What you’ll get out of tuning in
- How to determine when you need to have a difficult conversation
- The four steps for embracing and planning for a difficult conversation
- Why pre-determining what you want the other person to gain is key to creating a more positive energy during difficult conversations.
- 3:00 There are various tools that can help determine if you need to have a difficult conversation or not.
- 5:00 The brain supports us in our decisions to take action on difficult conversations.
- 6:30 It is not only possible to embrace difficult conversations, but there are actually specific steps you can take to make yourself welcome them even more.
- 12:30 Step three in embracing difficult conversations suggests ways to become clear about what you need the other person to hear.
- 14:45 Consider what positive outcome you would like for the other person involved in the conversation. Acknowledge that you want the highest good for everyone concerned.
- 17:00 Coaches can use specific tools and skills to engage clients in the difficult conversation of getting back on track.
- 21:20 You can get free support from Jamee to embrace your next difficult conversation!
- “Brain science around decision-making says once we make a decision to move forward, the chemicals in our brain support us in doing that.” – Jamee Tenzer
- “What is the incentive for you to have that difficult conversation? This is where we get back to reclaiming our energy.” – Jamee Tenzer
- “We can’t control what the other person is going to do, say, think or feel. But we do have a choice about what we want to take away from a difficult conversation.” – Jamee Tenzer
- “As a coach, I know that my clients know what’s best for them ultimately.” – Jamee Tenzer
- “If we are truly just going to be curious, and learn what we can from our client and why they’re in the position they’re in, and why they may be resisting that next step…curiosity gives us a lot of freedom to let go of the outcome.” – Jamee Tenzer
- “Once we make the decision to have a difficult conversation, that already frees our energy to move toward the conversation. We are empowering ourselves and putting ourselves in a space of more energy, rather than draining our energy.” – Brooke Bailey
Jamee Tenzer is a coach specializing in communication. For 15 years, she has coached executives in many industries including entertainment, non-profit, technology and design. She worked for 10 years as a trainer and supervisor for the International Coach Academy and continues to work internationally through her private mentoring practice and 3 continuing education courses for coaches she co-developed through her company, Coach Cachet.
Jamee is a Professional Certified Coach with the International Coach Federation, a Board Certified Coach with the Center for Credentialing and Education, and received a Certificate in Mediation from the Center for Dispute Resolution.
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